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Relationships

Relationships, like cocks, condoms and musical instruments, come in all varieties.

Some people have relationships with one person. Some have relationships with a few other people but only share certain feelings and sex with one partner, while others like to be more liberal about sex and relationships. For many people, condom usage is a regular part of the relationship’s equation, so they just carry on using them. Others may choose to discard condoms with one or more partners according to what they know of their partners’ HIV status, while maintaining condom use with other partner(s).

A common procedure for two or more people who want to have sex without a condom, is to use a condom for an initial period, during which they get tested at the same time to find out their respective HIV status and other STIs they may have. After any STIs or HIV infection are treated/well managed with antiviral treatment, they may stop using a condom within that constellation, while maintaining condom use with partners outside that relationship.

Sometimes, a relationship or agreement doesn’t quite work out as planned. Having sex with another person outside of your regular partner(s) or breaking the rules you’ve agreed upon can mean putting your partner(s) at risk of getting an STI. It is therefore very important to agree on which rules apply both within and outside of the relationship. If you make an agreement, consider discussing from the start what to do if one of you breaks that agreement. Having the courage and openness to talk about possible extracurricular relationships is one way of showing consideration.

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